Itching for Trouble

Itching for Trouble
by Lady

Story Notes

Title: Itching for Trouble
Chapter: One Chapter
Spoilers: Wraeththu, but no specific book
Date Posted: April 2004

Author: Lady

Notes: Mercredi told me of PY’s challenge (see her story here), so I decided to answer the call! *flexes her manliness* – Lady

Itching for Trouble




“No, Pell.”

“But I’m bored!”

Vaysh looked over at the Tigron, sprawled unceremoniously on the floor next to his chair. After a moment he sighed and returned to his tea.

“Oh Vaysh, come on!” The ravenhaired har sat up and pouted. “Don’t tell me you’re not interested.”

He set the cup down, raising his brows slightly and gazing at his reflection in the tea’s surface. “Have you thought of the potential consequences of this venture, Pellaz?”

“Bah.” Pell waved his hand dismissively and grinned. “He’ll never know.”


“Look, I already know how we’ll do it.”

“I don’t doubt you do.”

“Just say you’ll help me. I’ll take full responsibility for it.” Pellaz put his head on Vaysh’s thigh and looked up at him. “Pleeeeeease, Vaysh?”

Shaking his head, Vaysh sighed. “I know I’ll regret this.”


The following morning found Pellaz in Thiede’s chambers. His hair was still pinned up and drying from his bath. “You’re having breakfast soon?”

The flamehaired har smiled. “That would be the natural progression of things.”

“Would it be offensive if I joined you?” Not waiting for an answer, Pellaz sauntered out onto the balcony. He sat down in a wicker chair and lit a cigarette, offering one to Thiede once he joined him.

“Probably not.” Thiede sat across from him, inhaling deeply and eyeing his protégé. “And to what do I owe the pleasure?”

The Tigron cast him a sideways glance. “The hegemony meeting today. You’re going, aren’t you?”

“Ah.” Thiede smiled and leaned back in his chair. “Yes, certainly. It should prove to be very animated today.”

“Good. I wanted to discuss a few issues with you before we attend.”


Meanwhile, a very jittery Vaysh was stealing into Thiede’s bedroom. As usual he had layed out the robes and jewlery he planned to wear to the meeting. Listening intently to the discussion outside, he pulled a packet of powder from within his pocket and liberally coated the inside of Thiede’s clothing. A few quick looks around, and he dashed back to the safety of his own apartment, heart thudding in his chest. Once back he collapsed onto a couch in a fit of nervous giggles.


“And thus we call to order another meeting.” Ashmael looked bored and slumped back in his seat. He wasn’t looking forward to this meeting. There were too many differing opinions on the situation in Megalithica, and it was bound to lead to a shouting match, and, possibly, cups being thrown. While that would typically bring him amusement, Thiede’s presence would no doubt keep everyone in line. Not only that, but it meant that he had his own plans for resolution, and thus, all the arguments were meaningless.

He brushed golden hair from his eyes and adjusted his shirt. “So, which issue shall we discuss first?”

Chrysm stood, as was expected. “I propose we discuss the issue of Ponclast and the Varrish regime in Megalithica.” And he came through with the expected issue.

“The hegemony acknowledges Tiahaar Chrysm,” Ashmael yawned, “and accepts this issue. Speak freely, Tiahaar.”

A nod. “Thank you, Tiahaar. The real issue in Megalithica surrounds….”

Ashmael had already tuned him out and was glancing about at the other faces about the table. Few were listening. Most had already begun to gather their own notes for a rebuttal. Arahal looked half-asleep and hung over. The general smirked. He’d have to ask what he had been up to the night before.

His gaze swiftly passed Vaysh, he preferred to ignore him on the rare occasion that he attended. Instead he looked to Pell, wondering if he would be nodding, watching a fly buzz around the room, or frowning. Instead he found Pell’s full attention on Thiede. Ah, so he saw no real point to the proceedings either. Might as well see what the great Thiede was doing in response to Chrysm. Interest meant agreement, amusement or disinterest meant they would not be following through with his plans.

And the verdict was that he was…twitching? The general blinked and sat up in his char. Yes, he was most definitely twitching.

“Tiahaar, if I may, I would like to add my own information.”

“Hmm?” Ashmael blinked and looked about for the face matching the voice. “Oh, yes, yes. Tiahaar Griselming, we acknowledge and accept.”

Before Seel had begun to speak, Ashmael’s attention was trained back on Thiede. The twitching was quickly dissolving into wiggling.

He quickly glanced over at Pellaz. The Tigron did not seem to have the same affliction. Instead he was…giggling? Yes, there was a cup to his mouth, but the shake of the shoulders still gave him away. Ashmael’s eyes darted about the room. It seemed everyhar else was too preoccupied with their argument to have noticed. Only he, Pell, and, a quick glance confirmed Vaysh, were aware of Thiede’s situation.

And he was getting worse.

Thiede was now grimacing and rubbing his arms and back against the wood of his throne. Pellaz had taken to resting his elbow on the table and resting his face in his hand to conceal his mirth. Even Vaysh was tittering. The general was so intent in his fascination that he knocked over a mug, spilling wine across the table.

The conversation stopped abruptly and all eyes tuned in on him. He stared back, dark droplets splattering onto his white pants.

Chrysm smiled uncertainly. “Um…Ash….”

“Oh!” Thiede shot up, voice ringing loud and with finality. “That will leave a stain, Ashmael! Perhaps we should adjourn while Tiahaar Aldebaran finds a change of clothes.” He quickly strode out of the room, throwing, “we will reconvene in twenty minutes,” over his shoulder as he stepped out of the door.

“Motion seconded and passed. What are you all staring at?” Red faced and scowling, Ashmael stood and made his way over to Pell, ignoring Vaysh’s hasty disappearance. “Just what in the hell is going on?”

The Tigron looked up and fell into laughter. “Unbeknownst to him, our beloved Thiede was the unfortunate recipient of a large dose of itching powder this morning.”

“…You’re not serious.”

Pellaz laughed. “Oh I’m very serious.”

He smirked. “I’m sure you’ll have quite the cosmic price to pay.”

Shrugging, Pellaz beamed. “That’s assuming he knows who did it. Which, he doesn’t.”

“I wouldn’t be too sure of that, Tigron.” He shook his head and walked off to find a dry pair of pants. At least it hadn’t been a boring meeting.

The End